Distinguishing Qualities Of An Ideal Groom

Certain qualities set a man apart as an ideal husband from all other husbands. Every Christian man who desires to be a good husband must have these qualities. That you’re a Christian doesn’t automatically make you an ideal husband. There are several cases of so-called Christian husbands who have failed in their marriage because they lack some of these salient qualities that are like the bolts and knots that keep all the loins together in marriage.

It is therefore very important that as a Christian man, you should consciously work on yourself in order to be that rare man that any godly woman will love to have and keep as her ideal husband. Remember, you cannot give what you don’t have and you cannot get better at something if you do not work at it.

Some of these qualities are:
1) Love and affection: Genuine love is like glue that bonds a couple together through thick and thin. This kind of love emanates from God. In Ephesians 5:28 and 33, the Scripture admonishes that husbands should love their wives. When a man truly loves his wife, he would treat her with affection. For instance, when you truly love your wife, you will be gentle with her, polite to her, show her understanding and so on.

2) Maturity and spirituality: Maturity and advancement in age are two different things. One can be well advanced in age and yet, immature. Your level of maturity in marriage is measured by your ability to handle very sensitive issues such as finances, intimacy, in-laws and information/communication successfully, without unnecessary friction between you and your spouse (2 Peter 1:5-9). For any marriage to thrive, the couple must be mature emotionally, spiritually, physically, financially, socially and sexually.

3) Generosity: This is another fundamental quality on ideal husband should possess. He must be a giver. There are some men who are generous outsiders but tight-fisted at home. People sing their praise outside but their wives and their children suffer and starve at home. This is not generosity; it is hypocrisy (Ephesians 6:6). A generous man will promptly respond to his family’s needs. He is not only generous with money but with time, compliments and encouragements. He also extends his generosity to neighbours and friends alike, expecting nothing in return (Colossians 3:23).

4) Spirituality/Prayerfulness. As the head of the family, the Christian husband can only truly demonstrate the foregoing qualities through the help of God. Hence, a vibrant spiritual life and prayerfulness are inevitable. A fervent spiritual life keeps you intimate with God and enables you to obtain basic instructions from God for yourself and your family (Isaiah 30:21).

5) Honesty: Dishonesty is one factor that tears families apart without warning. To maintain a peaceful home, you’ve got to be honest at all times regardless of circumstances. An ideal husband is honest, and as such, he hides nothing from his wife. He does not try to fine-tune an information before passing it on to her (Proverbs 11:20). He allows her free access to his phone, laptop, email, bank accounts or social media accounts.

6) Loyalty: Loyalty is a crucial component in marriage, and every ideal husband must possess it. A man that is loyal to his wife will not in any way cheats on or deny her conjugal rights (1 Corinthians 7:2-5).

To become the ideal husband as described above, you need more than just growing up, reading books and consulting marriage counsellors. You need to have a definite encounter with God. He created you and He alone knows how to make you the ideal groom for the ideal bride. Are you still a sinner? Begin a fruitful relationship with Him today. Repent of all sins and invite Jesus into your heart. Constantly obey God and allow Him to guide you daily.

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